The Steve Rogers I knew and mourned would never, ever try to grope a woman with his burrito. But that is exactly what happened near my home town this past weekend. If there is one thing Brevard County has never been short of, it would be crazy drunken assholes, though they are usually not dressed quite so colorfully.
This particular case revolved around a drunken doctor who had to ruin an office costume party by stuffing his pants with a burrito and trying to force women to touch it. It’s a pretty sordid affair.
“Everything was fine until, witnesses said, Captain America started
getting too forward with a burrito he kept tucked inside his blue
tights, a burrito that ultimately landed him in jail.”
Let that be lesson to all would be underwear perverts with Mexican food harassment fetishes.